Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Guess What.. Formula is just fine

Hey Guess What
Formula is OK for your baby

I am not trying to be all controversial and I am definitely NOT suggesting that you should stop  breastfeeding. I am putting it out there that babies will be just fine on formula.
I survived on formula!

I think it is wonderful how breastfeeding is becoming more and more accepted and encouraged. There are so many facts that support breastfeeding that not only benefits the baby but also the mom. 

But you know.. sometimes it just doesn't always work out. 

When I was at the point with Bo to decide to keep breastfeeding or switch to formula I did all the research I could. I like to think that I research A TON on the products I use or different techniques to see the pros and cons of all things baby.

When I was trying to do research on the best formula for breastfed babies, or stopping breastfeeding altogether --- I came up with barely anything for my personal research.

I was so frustrated at the time because breastfeeding was just not working out for the both of us. 
I was still struggling with PPD and was resenting the fact that I was the only person that could feed him. Lack of sleep, PPD, Bo not latching and everything else was not a good combination for me. 

The point where I decided I am making the switch to formula was when we found blood in his diapers. SCARY thing for a first time and anxious mom.

He ended up going on hypoallergenic formula and it has worked out great for the both of us.

Since the switch to formula I started to feel like I could really enjoy feeding him and bonding with him. The complete opposite of what I heard of with formula feeding. 
My husband was able to help me out those few weeks taking turns at night.
I didn't feel like I was restricted in going out of the house or trying to time everything just right. I felt like I had somewhat of my life and sanity back.

Some moms have breastfeeding down to an art and science. They have perfected it.
All I am saying is it doesn't work for everyone for whatEVER the reason may be. 

Sure, I didn't have problems with milk production or I could probably have changed my diet to help his digestion but I still was not truly able to give Bo the love and attention he needed. 
And you know what? 
He is alive, happy, healthy and extremely active 7 month old.

I am not against breastfeeding.. I will try again with my next children
I am just pro-whatever works best for you and your baby

don't let anyone make you feel guilty.. including yourself!
I was my worse guilt-tripper during that time. I felt like I failed and wasn't a good mom blah blah..
that obviously wasn't true.

It is OK to be the only person in your group of friends or family formula feeding. It is OK to say to your husband 'Hey why don't you feed the baby tonight I need a break'

Do what is best for you and the baby! You know better then anyone else.



Monday, April 7, 2014

My Post -- Crazies

Can I just say that I had no clue who I was the first few weeks after Bo.
I was a completely different person. 
Crying all the time. 
Seriously all the time over anything and everything. 

I had a C-Section and I loved it -- for the main reason that I got to stay in the hospital for 5 extra days! 
Yeah 5 days of nurses helping me, 5 days of letting Bo go to the nursery at night so I could sleep.. It was awesome! and you know what...I don't feel bad about it.

Then we went home.. uggh home! I don't know why everyone gets so excited about going home from the hospital. I mean let's get real, they brought me food for breakfast, lunch and dinner; I never had to get out of bed if I didn't want to or get dressed; nurses giving me the pills I needed-- Now that is the life! 

That first night I was so freaked out because of all the torturing I did to myself googling all that I could about SIDS and other scary things that could happen. 
My mom came the week after Bo was born, and what a relief.
I would probably still be crying if my family didn't help me out.
She got up with him in the night, came to the circumcision appointment (worst thing ever for someone with PPD) taught me how to do this baby stuff and then she had to leave. 
I think I bawled the 3 days BEFORE she left because I was thinking about her leaving and cried for days after she left. 

Then my dad came for the next week which was great since I was still recovering from my C-Section.
(Same thing just crying and crying and crying) 
So lucky for me my mom came back when he left because I was a hot mess. 
HOT. MESS.
Again I have no idea who the heck I was. I hate crying. It gives me a terrible headache but I just couldn't help it. 

 He's looking at me thinking.. "YOU'RE the one that's supposed to take care of me?" 
I know man I hear ya! I can't even take care of myself!

My Dad MADE me get out of the house.. which was good but I certainly did NOT want to.


It was pretty obvious to me that I had Postpartum Depression.
It's bad when the person that has PPD realizes it too instead of in denial. 
I talked to so many people that went through what I was going through. It was incredibly helpful to realize that strong women I look up to experienced the constant crying and anxiety I was feeling. 
It made me feel better that I won't be crazy like this forever! Whew!
At my postpartum doctor appointment I was upfront with my doctor about everything I was feeling. She had PPD pretty bad too when she had her babies and she prescribed Zoloft for me. 
She said it helped her and the other people that I talked to told me that they wished they took care of the problem sooner. 
It made all the difference to help me balance my psycho hormones that I couldn't control. 

People are starting to become familiar with Baby Blues and Postpartum Depression but I still feel like it has a bad rap that most people won't admit or talk about it. 
I was so grateful I had people to talk to and so grateful for modern medicine that I could start feeling like myself after a few weeks. 
It worked so well that I wanted to cry and I couldn't! 
 I could actually enjoy the moments with Bo instead of staring at him in the middle of the night with tears streaming down my face. 
I weened off of Zoloft after 3 months and I feel great. I didn't have any weird reactions and I would recommend anyone out there to talk to someone, especially their doctor, if they are feeling anything that I had. 
A good support system was key for me. 
Now I know for the future with my next babies I will most likely start Zoloft or something similar right away.

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Montezuma's-- I mean... Bo's Revenge

A little TMI but what isn't TMI with babies? One of the first few things Dane and I say to each other after the usual musings of the day is "did Bo poop today?" The person doing the asking is really hoping the other says "yes" so that is one more day we won't have to wait around for a ticking time bomb of poop to go off.

Recently we changed Bo's formula back to the regular hypoallergenic formula instead of the super-duper hypoallergenic formula (our wallets are happy! and Bo's tummy is happy!) Since the switch he has major blowouts. I mean nuclear. I mean toxic. Smelly, runny, and 3 out of 4 times ruining his clothes as well as anything else that is within a 2 foot radius. The doc said all is well. He's not dehydrated or sick, just a sensitive tummy. 

As you can imagine I am constantly on my toes with every toot I hear. Hoping and wishing he will do it when we are home and not when we are out and about for the day. 
I should start packing around a closet in my car.

I was driving and I heard it. How can those cute tiny bodies make such horrifying noises!?
I pulled over in a parking lot and cleared out the back of my car. 




Luckily it was just warning shots of what was coming hours later. Whew!

Anyone else have funny experiences?


PS. He is always keeping us on our toes and constantly making us laugh!


Friday, March 21, 2014

Learning to Keep it Real

A few days ago I about had it with social media... so I went to social media for my rant. Ironic? Of course! but I was over the way people (myself included) portray their life as a highlight real while I sit here most days in my little apartment in pajamas watching the Price is Right and spit-up somewhere on myself.. I could smell it. I just didn't have the energy to find it.

This is what I said...

"maybe I'm just being a grump today but here's my one public rant ever.. are these people that blog and post beautiful professional images of their life for real? for some reason it is really buggy today and I'll get over it in an hour but come on. are peoples lives that perfect and trendy? where are the real life people who don't get out of their pajamas until 4 o clock or have throw-up all over themselves, or can only get 20 seconds of productivity because their kid is chewing on cords or they constantly hit their head repeatedly on the wall (uh yes i really hope this is just a phase and that he is training to be a football player).. it would be nice to see people keep it real more often. am I missing the boat and alone on this? lets keep it real, people! alright I'm done! sorry I never do this"

I know! There is nothing more annoying then dirty laundry getting thrown across Facebook. I gave myself a free pass and Ta-Da a can of worms opened up. Some people thought I was truly upset about my life and being a mom. False-- I LOVE IT! I wouldn't have it any other way then to be able to stay at home with my boy! I know I am so so lucky.  I was surprised to find out how many people agree with me. It was great to see that I wasn't the only one who thought it was a success that I showered before 1 PM. (Which reminds me.. I should shoot for that goal again today). 

Since I opened my can of worms.. I really kept coming back to my thoughts on trying to keep it real. I don't have the fanciest things, I am not a supermodel, I don't even brush my hair (for real I don't own a brush or a comb) but I am a new mom trying to figure out how to take care of this amazing little guy who stole my heart. Just like all you mamas with little ones that stole yours. I don't need the extra pressures from popular blogs that I need to do a picture perfect party, wear a size 2 and have blown out hair all without getting thrown up on. This is going to be a place I can post real things that happen to real moms or dads. 

My life is not fabulous and that is fine by me! And I am not trying to make a statement that trendy things can never be fun, or I never get dressed up and put makeup on. No way. I love actually getting dressed in real clothes and going out of the house when my hair isn't still wet. That's all apart of real life too! I guess in the end this is for me to challenge myself to not get caught up in the glitz and glam of everything and talk about how I might have stayed in my PJs for 2 days straight once or twice or have piles of laundry to do but I end up pushing it off because the dryer is right next to Bo's room and those naps are precious to me!--I mean him. 

I love my job and life and wouldn't change it 


Come on.. look at how awesome that Lettuce Head is and that man holding him is pretty dang fine 


Life is awesome with little ones.. not convenient but we mamas make it work! 


And I wouldn't have it any other way..



Just trying to keep it real one nap at a time.